What Do You Know About My Ugly Shoes?

While walking down my hall in the building I live in, I saw a pair of shoes sitting outside the door of one of my neighbors. These were some ugly shoes. They were red flats that were really faded and chipped up. Toward to bottom of the shoes, the color was peeling off them. They looked like some shoes she may have picked up at Ross or T.J. Maxx or Marshalls for $10. The lady that owned these shoes really got her monies worth. But, as sure as I was sitting there judging this woman’s shoes, I thought to myself “what in the hell do I know about her ugly shoes?”. The more I thought about that statement, the clearer it came to me. We all look at each other and we are quick to make judgments about each other without really understanding a thing about the person we are judging. We see someone having a bad day or in the middle of a very troubling part of their life and we are quick to call them a “hot mess” again, we all do this. It’s just a flawed part of our human nature and I am desperately trying to find a way to stop doing that.

I know my shoes are ugly…..and I would not trade them in for the world. These shoes of mine, though tattered and worn, have carried me through the Navy and 2 tours in the Persian Gulf, sexual abuse that took my innocence as a child and forced me to grow up way before my time. They carried me through heartache and mourning and they have never fit more perfectly.

These shoes of mine, though “ugly” have not only seen me through the hard times. I have worn these shoes through the greatest love of my life, a 9 year partnership with an amazing man and some of the most significant triumphs of my life.
It’s amazing to me that we all keep going even when we feel like we have given all we have to give. The resilience of the human spirit amazes me all the time. We hear stories on the world wide web all the time about the heart of a lion living in the body of a lamb. I remember a story that was posted on Facebook about a physically disabled young man that ran the most amazing field race with his classmates. Not only was his ability to run inspiring, but the support from the people looking on, the coach and his fellow runners. I bet those “ugly shoes” have stories to tell and a few lessons to teach about love, kindness and strength of spirit.

I can’t tell you the number of times I have felt like I had met my match…..that life has done me in and I was done. The nights that I may have sat at home feeling sorry for myself and wishing for change. It’s those “ugly shoes” that continued to carry me through it.

I posted a status on Facebook asking people what they thought of their “ugly shoes” the following response came from a brother that could not have summed it up better:

My "Ugly Shoes" are flexible, dependable, and resilient. They have formed into a perfect mold through my heavy challenges and soaring triumphs. These shoes are so gorgeous; I wear all my new shoes inside them, because I want all the world to see the shine through the scratches and scuffs. You see, my "Ugly Shoes" are the lead to strut, the pimp in my walk, the kick to my swag. – J. O.