Mirrors

In my life I’ve learned that bitter hearts won’t hold a smile and troubled minds will wear us all down. One of the most challenging things that I face is being able to look back at my past life and understand that everything I have experienced has led to the very moment I am in right now. That’s not a bad thing. Letting my past help me get ahead and go forward with the knowledge that I may not be quite where I want to be, but I well beyond where I used to be and I welcome the future with a scary excitement that helps me keep my eye on the prize. What lessons have I learned? The reality is that I make attempts to learn from my mistakes all of the time and I hold back my tears (when I can) and I think “You have to find a way to make it. These clouds won’t last and will let up for a while”. I’m not always successful with that, but with each attempt I become less afraid to try. Sometimes you have to make the mirror your best friend and maybe….just maybe, that’s when you’ll find peace of mind. Loving yourself when it seems that no one else can….that’s peace of mind. For Real.

I’m not saying that is the remedy for everyone, truth be told, it’s not always my remedy. I portray strength and I reflect on things and remember what my mentors, family and close friends have taught me but I never know the right answer. I pray. I tell myself that no matter what, I will achieve and with every failure, I brush my shoulders off because there will always be bridges that I will have to cross and I will always find a way to make it because….the clouds always let up for a while.
Life as I experience it is about humanity and spirituality. Connecting with people and understanding my insignificance AND relevance in the grand scheme of things puts me both in a position to learn something and to teach something. I just want to do what’s right even when it’s not the popular thing to do…..even when I want to slap the hell out of all of it….even when I know that it won’t be in my favor. My God….that is the hardest thing ever!

I suppose that the immediate benefit of doing what is right is the feeling that I get when I know that what I did…or said had a positive impact on someone else’s day. So, attempt to be nice whenever the opportunity presents itself. After all, the people we see every day are fighting battles that we never know about and that smile could be the one thing good that happens for them that day. I assure you….it can change a life.

All praise to the The Most High for always being the focal point in my life and for helping me to remember that the clouds always let up….for a while. For Real

Here we go again

And…it has happened…again.

The devastation that weighs heavy on my soul is the shatter of hearts and homes. The despair on the faces of my brothers and sisters that reads like a very bad horror novel. Hope is all we have if we trust in it like the infancy of a new born baby and nourish it with faith, we can not only rebuild the home and hearts…we can rebuild the spirt and mend the soul. But, that is just not enough anymore.

There are 58 souls to add to the reasons that things need to change. But there are countless numbers of hearts that will never be the same again. The world appreciates the thoughts and prayers, but thoughts don’t change laws and prayers can’t call or kiss or embrace the loved ones lost.

Evil perched himself high above the innocent and took its time. Arranged its nest to slaughter its prey and to make them feel the wrath of what I can only imagine was a chaotic caldron of calculated callousness. He was a coward.

I can’t help but to wonder why. I want to understand what would make a person do something so absolutely heinous. To be honest, no explanation would ever be enough…but I just want to know. Why was he sooooo determined to ruin the lives of so many people…..people that he never even met. He never met that couple married for 32 years…high school sweethearts. Now, he has to talk about his beloved wife and best friend in past tense. He never met the 23 year old daughter and college student with nothing but promise and possibility ahead of her. He never met the 56 other souls that he determined meant nothing to this world or the people in it.
But, this is just another news story. This is just another reason for those of us against the current gun laws to say “see, we need new laws” and for those that “believe in the 2nd amendment” to say “Leave our guns alone”. What more does it take? How many lives have to be shattered before we can sit down and realize that it’s easier to change the laws to keep guns out of the hands of people that shouldn’t have them than it is to change the hearts and minds of evil?

The leader of our country is not going to help us to soothe and he certainly isn’t going to do anything to change the laws. What more does he need? And….if one more person says ANYTHING about the number of gun deaths in Chicago I’m going to explode! Yes…gun violence in cities like Chicago and Houston are pretty high. In fact, 58 people were killed in Chicago over a 28 day period. In Las Vegas, 58 people died due to gun violence in about 11 minutes. All of those lives lost are sad, but why pinpoint Chicago? My opinion is that when you quote the stats for Chicago, it tends to be a great argument for the reason why more people in America should run out and buy more guns to “keep them safe”. What about the 58 souls lost in Las Vegas? What does the level of gun violence have to do with the fact that 1 man was able to purchase in excess of 20 gun…of all types? Why did this one man need that many guns? I don’t know a lot….but I do know that he was not protecting himself from anything. He was not guarding his home and personal property…he was perched high above a crowd of unsuspecting people enjoying a concert. WTF?

I have no answers….just questions. It’s hard for me to phantom this sort of evil. Maya Angelou says “we are all human, therefore, nothing human can be alien to us”. So….if this sort of evil can be in this man….this much more love can be in all of us.

I understand that prayers can’t change laws…but they touch the soul. So, giving praise to the Most High, I end with this scripture:
Be Anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable….if anything is excellent or praiseworthy…think on these things.